From the Huffington Post:
Republican Kansas Governor Sam Brownback signed a bill aimed at keeping state courts and agencies from using Islamic or other non-U.S. laws when making decisions, his office said on Friday . . .
Since the Kansas legislature is in the mood to get results on important issues, here are some more things they might consider:
- Prohibit the refining, posession, manufacture or sale of kryptonite or kryptonite-related paraphernalia.
- Define marriage as being the union of two human beings, or at the very most, one human and one vampire.
- Officially define the sky as being blue, except in circumstances of clouds, night, and plagues of locusts.
- Form a committee to research the 1913 World’s Fair in Ghent, Belgium, to establish why it was just not all that worldy and sort of meh.
- Prohibit the ghost of Napoleon’s horse from running for elected office unless he can produce a valid U.S. birth certificate from any state except Hawaii.
- Automatically deny any application for a liquor license or a parade permit to the fourth dentist who refused to recommend Trident.
- Outlaw the wearing of live chipmunks or hamsters as earmuffs, unless they are suitably sedated by a certified veterinarian.
- Require all beached whales of 10 tons or more in Junction City or the surrounding state parks and recreation areas be given “reasonable life-saving measures” for at least two hours before being sold to a Japanese whaling vessel.
- Officially declare that the word “Kansas” has six letters and is worth a base score of 10 points in Scrabble if you’re allowing proper nouns, which although is not all that many points, sometimes you can get the K on the triple letter score and hit the double word score at the same time then it would be worth, well, um, a lot more than 10 points.
- Require all inmates to have access to air and gravity